When I was originally toying with the idea of becoming a SAHM, I constructed a list of pros/cons. The list of pros was miles long, the list of cons were few, but had enough weight behind them to cause many a sleepless night. When it came to breaking the news, it wasn’t even the bosslady that I was the most nervous about. It was our childcare provider Mary.

Mary has a certain patience, caring, and passion for her job that enables the kids in her care to really flourish. She was Gavin’s sole childcare provider, but Quentin had 3 before her (that’s a whole other story). Quentin has definitely learned more under her care than with anyone else. I worried that I wouldn’t be able to match her enthusiasm, nor provide the same level of stimulus (I still worry about this!). I also loved how organized & super creative she is (she doesn’t think so, but dagnabbit she totally is!). Plus she’s cute and fun to be around (how can a person be so chipper sans alcohol!?). Often she’ll call me so unbelievably excited/happy about something that I’m secretly thinking to myself, “dang, this chick either just slammed down some serious vodka or like FIVE Red Bulls!”. But anyway, I digress…

We were both a little heartbroken when I told her that I’d be quitting my job to stay at home. However, we recently agreed (and I swear no alcohol was involved) that we may have lost the childcare relationship, but we’ve “gained a friendship”! Awww, how sweet is that? (Ok, no gagging). It’s true though, our kids still love playing together and we’ve become friends not just acquaintances. To show you how truly awesome she is, I want to share with you this UNIQUE gift she put together for me when she knew I was having a rough week with the SAHM thing (which is like every week of my life right?)…

Stay at Home Mom's Survival Kit

Not only is everything in this bucket USEFUL (and much of it is already gone), it totally lifted my spirits because each item had a label or cute tag on it with a witty description!

Here’s what was included in the bucket:

• Mr. Clean Magic Erasers – “This gets crayon off almost anything”
• DUM-DUMS (lollipops) – “A Mom’s secret weapon”
• Pink polka-dot magnetic list pad – “Lists, lists everywhere”
• Travel-sized Advil – “For all that banging, clanking, loud noise…”
• Travel-sized Tylenol PM – “For the nights you can’t sleep…”
• Pink polka-dot Pocket tissues – “Sometimes you need a good cry”
• 8-pack of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups – (I forgot what this one said and we already snarfed them up, so package is gone.)
• Snacks! (Microwave popcorn, crackers, fruit bar, crystal light mix-ins) – “For when you need a snack…”
• Top Ramen – “For the days you just don’t want to cook…” (That would be EVERYDAY!)
• Pomegranate scented tea lights – “This is so you can have some Mommy time…”
• Black cherry vanilla bath crystals – (also for Mommy time)
• Two Michelob Ultras – “When all else fails… DRINK!”
• Carton of Merlot – “Sometimes you don’t have time to find a cork screw” (Amen to that sista!)
• Drink coasters (to go with the wine) – that say, “You had me at Merlot”
• Matching wine stopper
• Matching wine journal

It was all so brilliant! But I think the item I got the biggest kick out of was the wee carton of Merlot. I had no idea they made wine like that. I recall the wine in a box of the 1980’s, but a little “juice box” of wine?!? FABULOUS!!

The best part, You had me at Merlot

Thanks again Mary! LOVE IT! And tell them all to “bite it” because having a big heart is a wonderful virtue :)

Juice box for adults

My my, times they have changed… so maybe 7 years ago a night like this would find me currently at a bar, partying/drinking myself into oblivion. Then (sometime after bar closing) chatting online until god-knows-when-in-the-morning… three or four chat windows open, in a couple chatrooms, sending reply emails left & right… Tonight? Circa 2009? 9:00PM. Husband asleep, kiddos asleep, looking up recipes for “Banana Nut Bread” in order to frugally utilize the overripe bananas in the fruit basket and composing a meal planner for the next week. GOOD LORD I AM SO EXCITING. Nevermind, that I’ve had (I don’t know how many) vodka & lo-carb monsters (thank you Mary!), Michelob Ultra Lights, and now a glass of Shiraz… tomorrow at 6:30am I will be HATING MY LIFE as a 2-year old barges into my room exclaiming“MomMom, guy in my room!” and I dig myself deeper into the covers, pretending like I’m not alive.

And also… If I have to watch “The Cars Moonie” or “The Doggie Moonie” (translation: Disney’s Cars Movie or Bolt) ONE MORE FREAKIN’ TIME… I just might have to bang my head on a hard surface for several moments. Note to self: get more kid’s DVDs ASAP.

And lastly, I just looked at my referrers and someone found this site by searching for “sahm bitching during toddler years”. LOL! ! I think I have a new tagline!